Week 48: X Marks the Spot (To Finding Treasure) & X-Ray

 Fun Activity This Week: Enjoy lots and lots of X’s and O’s (hugs and kisses).  I realize you are probably doing this every day but make an effort this week to spend some meaningful time bonding in a physical way. Turn off your phones and just focus on each other, even if only for a few minutes for a long embrace. Let all cares go and use this time to connect and if needed, let go of any minor issues you may have in your marriage (major issues need more work than just X's and O's, of course). Make romantic time a priority!  

Week 48: X Marks the Spot (To Finding Treasure) & X-Ray: 

X Marks the Spot (To Finding Treasure): If you want to find the greatest treasure you can utilize that will guarantee you a joyful marriage, you do not need to go on an elaborate treasure hunt.  To know where X marks the spot to the greatest resource to help your marriage, you need to look no farther than the Bible.  If you read only one instructional book on how to have a good marriage, the absolute best Book you should read is the Bible.  You may think you can only find great teachings on how to be a good spouse in Proverbs 31 and Ephesians 5.  Yet, countless other passages in the Bible offer excellent advice not just on married life, but also on how to treat people with kindness, humility, patience, and so on.  Because your spouse is a people, you can apply all verses on how to treat each other with loving kindness to your mate! ;)  In other words, The Bible is a perfect marriage counselor!

The Bible is also great for encouragement.  It reminds us of how much Christ loves us and wants only the best for His children.  It is the best resource on informing us how to live right and holy lives.  Reading God’s instructions daily (or at least weekly outside of church) will help keep you accountable and honorable.  The more moral you try to live your life, the happier and more stable your marriage will be.

It reminds us that God created us for pleasure and gives us freedom to enjoy our spouses sexually.  The Biblical book of the Song of Solomon clearly lets us know that God fully intended our marriages to be enjoyable in many ways.  

The entire Bible is worth reading and especially worth reading with your spouse.  It is a proven fact that spouses who spend time reading the Bible together on a regular basis and apply what they read to their lives (not just being a hearer only, but a doer as well, see James 1:22), along with praying together, have much better marriages (more faithful and less conflict) than those that only read once in a while or not at all.   

If you have difficulty reading, I highly recommend buying the Bible on CD (I would suggest skipping the Hollywood versions for obvious reasons).  Or have your Kindle or other electronic device read it to you. When I was a veterinary technician, I worked long hours and was in the car for at least an hour a day due to the commute back and forth.  I usually spent my drive to work praying, but I listened to The Bible on my way home from a job that was physically, emotionally, and mentally challenging.  Instead of rehashing all the stressful things that had happened during the day, I was encouraged by the Word of God.  By the time I got home, I was much calmer than when I had left work.  I was single then, but I can imagine the benefit that would have been to a marriage when I was able to greet my husband with a positive attitude after a long day of stress.  So, consider the Bible a good attitude adjuster as well!

X-Ray:  When I was a veterinary technician, I loved looking at X-rays and ultrasounds. I wished I had worked in a clinic with MRI and CT scan equipment so I could have viewed even more.  All that lies under the surface of what we cannot see is truly amazing as well as fascinating.  

Do not make your spouse guess at what is going on inside of you.  Be as transparent as an X-ray.  Be honest and be yourself.  When you have nothing to hide, you will have a happier, more peaceful marriage.  Besides, we all know that when one assumes to know what the other is feeling, it can cause problems.  

When you speak your feelings to your mate rather than holding your feelings in, it increases your trust in one another.  The more you talk, the more comfortable you will be in sharing everything.  Of course, not every thought in your head needs to be shared, but when you have an issue of which you cannot let go, or you have fears that need comforting, being transparent with your mate and let him/her know what is on your mind.  Do not just be negative, talk about the things that interest you as well as your hopes and dreams.  Share your likes and dislikes.  Bond over all the things you have in common and learn about the items you do not know about so that you can eventually bond over those items as well. Hint: Showing an interest in something that matters to your mate (learning and studying about it) such as a charity, a goal, or a hobby, is putting love into action.  

Revealing your heart and sharing your mind with your loved one without the aid of scientific technology is even more marvelous than looking at an X-ray film. 

And of course, keep no dangerous secrets from each other either. If you are trying to hide something from your spouse because you know he/she will not approve, you have serious issues that may require counseling. Remember, even if you never get caught, you cannot keep secrets from God.

 In the day when God shall judge the secrets of men by Jesus Christ according to my gospel. Romans 2:16

Marriage-Enhancing Ideas for the Week:  

X Marks the Spot (To Finding Treasure):  Each of you choose a favorite verse (or just one of you if you prefer), memorize it and recite it to your spouse.  Tell each other why this verse is a special treasure to you.  

Art Project Option: Glue construction or scrapbook paper on cardboard and write your favorite verse(s) with markers.  Decorate the cardboard with glitter, ribbons, buttons, etc. if you would like.  If you like to sew, you can cross-stitch or embroider the verse(s) on cloth and frame them.  Hang them on the refrigerator or somewhere else you frequently pass.  The verse(s) will remind you of God’s goodness as well as what is important to your loved one’s soul. I realize that several of my art project ideas are similar but it is so very important to our marriages to have scripture verses continually in view and in our hearts to remind us to be the kind of spouse God intended us to be!

X-Ray:  Are you being open and honest with your honey, or does he/she have to guess what you are feeling?  Do your best to let go of reticent patterns and be transparent with your partner.